Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Luke has a new tooth!

While I was sitting in the dental surgeon's office yesterday, awaiting the removal of two teeth, I actually got a pleasant surprise! We found Luke's first tooth! I know, I know, this is not my first baby and it sounds a little silly.'s amazing all the same. He laughed so hard when I felt it. Like he is incredibly proud of growing a tooth! Well, he should be. He's been working real hard at it, with lots of discomfort and drool, for a while now.

By the way, anyone who knows me and my mouth (I did not say my BIG MOUTH), will not be surprised at this other development. When the surgeon was removing my teeth, he accidentally broke off another tooth and had to remove that, too. So now I'm recovering form the removal of THREE teeth. Ouch!

No, candance, it's not Castle dental this time.

Friday, February 23, 2007

Yes, the weekend!

Another really crummy day at work - struggling not to absorb all the yucky stuff.'s Friday! And I have all weekend to spend with my grandchildren. I'm going to play games and read books and make fun snacks and rediscover my inner child!

Anyone else have great plans for the weekend?

Thursday, February 22, 2007

Today at work I...

..Resolved several patient psychotropic medication issues

...Provided crisis counseling to an offender who believed the microphone in his housing unit was beeping at him through the night - and suddenly discovered that his requested "faith" unit annoyed the heck out of him because he couldn't stand hearing about Jesus all the time

...Transferred a patient who suddenly decided he needed to cut someone, himself or an officer or just anyone

...Provided crisis counseling to a severely depressed patient who hears voices telling him awful things (they never do say anything nice), including telling him not to trust me

...Handled a patient who suddenly discovered his change in work assignment was going to devastate his daily schedule

...Made rounds in the solitary cells, providing counseling to one patient who is facing life endangerment issues (other offenders are trying to kill him)

...and then saw my regularly scheduled patients, charted on everybody, and then scheduled about a zillion more patients for tomorrow.

Not complaining. Just venting. Big difference.

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Fantastic Women

I've just got to plug my Women's Group here. We met tonight, as we do about every two weeks, for our book discussion. Part of the meeting ends up being about the book and the rest is about our lives and what's important to us. I love that we can talk politics, world events, women's rights, you name it. We disagree with each other about as often as we agree. That's what makes the group so special to me. When everyone thinks entirely alike, how can you learn from one another? The other part that I like is that we are all women with metaphysical beliefs. No real fundamentalists here. Not that there's anything wrong with that (insert Seinfeld moment here). Just that we all have the same overall perspective and share the same basic spiritual beliefs. How great is that???

So tonight we briefly got off on a tangent about the choices we make before we're born and the choices we continue to make that affect every aspect of our lives. Told you we're cool! Then I get home and check my email. There's a message from the Universe. Yep, we correspond. We're tight. Actually, it's a service offered (free) through So here is my message for today:

I'm alright with the concept of Karma as it's generally understood, Cheryl, kind-of, sort-of.

The idea of spiritual contracts is pretty nifty, too. You've always been a wheeler-dealer.

Except, of course, if either were laws, you wouldn't be unlimited.

Not even a little.

Oh well, they were cute ideas for awhile.

The Universe

Me again. That Universe! Always so timely! So where do you stand? Spiritual contracts? Karma? Law of attraction?

P.S. Emily has really great stories about being a Colonel on the drill team - and she's only 12!

Monday, February 19, 2007

Self Love

I read this last night in this month's issue of Indigo Sun, The article is titled, "A Gift for YOU: Five Steps to the Ultimate Love Affair" by Jody Howard. Here is an excerpt from the intro:

It amazes me how much easier it is to give our love and compassion to someone else rather than to our Self. We are quick to hold and comfort someone hurt and crying. When we experience our own pain, we feel frustrated with our self and with those that caused our pain, instead of comforting our self. We believe we heal our self by justifying our actions or blaming others, when in truth we heal by loving our self.

I tend to do that, you know, the being frustrated with myself part, when I make a mistake. Wonder how many of you out there do the same?

Thing is, I bought a hog about 2 weeks ago at work. Read previous posts for what buying a hog entails in prison speak. I've blamed myself because I knew the patient was selling me something and I just thought it would be easier to go along with it. He was threatening suicide and despite my efforts to calm him down, he insisted he needed to go to the crisis management unit. So I sent him. It was a Friday night. I was late for daycare. As soon as I started the process, he changed his entire attitude. You see, I believe he knew that once started, the process cannot be stopped. I don't care if God herself came down and said, "it's cool, he can stay," that patient HAS to be transported. So he began saying really awful things to the nurses. Making threats. Getting a serious attitude with me. I found out later that if he is transported to a crisis unit, all of his disciplinary cases get dismissed. That includes the ones he had pending before the "suicide" threat and the ones he got right before being transported. When he came back from the 3-day "vacation" he had the nerve to come in my office and thank me for making all of the cases go away. So not only did I allow this manipulator to get off without any consequences, I also feel I let down my co-workers who went to the trouble to write disciplinary cases against him. They don't hold it against me. They know I regret my decision. And they didn't know either, what would happen with the transfer. So I'm the only one who has been kicking myself.

Plus, he's still my patient. A little tough to have that old unconditional positive regard here.

This article spoke to me on so many levels. Why didn't I just comfort myself for that awful Friday evening? Why wasn't I more understanding of myself? Yes, I've got a lot more to learn about Self-love. (For helpful tips, be sure to check out StaceyG's blog - she's got some GREAT stuff!)

For me, I'm beginning to dislike the taste of pork.

Saturday, February 17, 2007

By popular request

More prison stories to follow...

In the flow

First, a great big "Thank you!" to all those who have helped me be in the flow these last several weeks:

Christy - who loaned me her husband's car to use for a week! And to her husband, Jim, who graciously said it was fine with him - Jim, you're a gem, but I bet you've heard that before!

Marcia - who drove to prison to pick me up from work, altering her sleep schedule to make sure I didn't end up sleeping at prison :)

Rachel - who got up extra early to drive me TO prison - what a kid!

Candice - who said she'd be there for me - and meant it

Stacey - whose faith in me keeps me afloat and whose faith in the universe inspires me

And to all others out there, from church, from women's group, and everywhere - thank you for continuing to hold me in the light and see me through this.

I did keep going to work even when my car was repossessed. And I did get the car back before it was auctioned. Even more importantly (and boy! are those first 2 things important!), the universe kept me afloat. I continually remind myself that my job, my car, my paycheck, and everything else that may appear paramount - are not my true source. The universe/God is my source. Yes, Bubba's Sis, I use the terms "universe" and "god" interchangeably. I also use "creator." They all mean the same to me - my higher power.

I believe that gratitude is one of the tools that keeps my good flowing. Actually, it's not just ME that believes that - a great many friends also hold that belief. And it's a principle that Unity has been teaching for about a hundred years. Also, The Secret (a DVD totally worth your while to watch) is spreading the news.

I remain incredibly grateful for all the big and little things in my life, all those things I see now and all those that have yet to manifest.

A mini-list:
1. My faith
2. My family (extended)
3. My friends
4. My bed (hey! it's a pillow top...)
5. My education
6. Job/job skills
7. Vacations
8. Pets
9. My very own home
10. A forum for my thoughts