So yesterday I went to court again regarding my soon-to-be son's case. This was the second time we were supposed to go to trial to terminate parental rights. Once again, due to some technical glitch, we were postponed for another 3 months. I was disappointed, to say the least. Still not closer to adopting him. Another vacation day wasted. More time off work means working that much harder when I go back. Tired of going to court. Tired of attorneys and court rooms. Tired of that stupid drive downtown. Tired of not being his legal mom.
I told a friend about it and complained, "Jeez, you'd think these people got paid by the month! They keep postponing this until it's almost 2 years later!" Then she said, "uh, they DO get paid by the month."
Call me an optimist or just some sort of wishful thinker or call me anything you want, really, I won't hear you, but I started thinking of some of the positives in all this.
Even though I can't call myself his legal mom, I do call myself his mother. More importantly, he calls me "mommy." Even though I don't like the drive downtown and the traffic, I do have a car that I trust, have air conditioning, have a radio/CD player, and can afford the gas it takes me to get there. I do get to go to court and have court appointed attorneys working on this case. I have a GREAT CPS caseworker. We hear so much about the bad CPS people but I have had 2 out of 2 good people working on this case. I do have vacation days to take off. How many people don't get any paid time off? And I do have a job I love to which to return.
I am adopting this boy I call my son. It may take longer than I would have liked, but it is happening.
Who would have "thunk" it a few years ago (least of all me!)? I'm a mommy again. I have a son.
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And that's the way to look at it. Good for you! You're already his mommy in spirit anyway.
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